Interview with a Leeski.


I got bored, so I interviewed a Lee. Now with  English spelling!

Me: Good Evening Leeski.

Lee: Hello Will.

Me: So, what are you doing at the moment.

Lee: you forgot the question mark for a start.

Me: Okay, what are you doing at the moment?

Lee: Look at trains on Wiki.

Me: Any particular reason?

Leeski: I like Trains. Phwoar, i could listen to the sound of one. (They’ve got sound files of them.)

Me: Any train in particular?

Lee: No, any.

Me: what got you interested in trains?

Lee: Seeing them, seeing them when i was younger. Also Thomas the Tank Engine.

Me: ‘Seeing trains’, was this some sort of romantic scenario? You mentioned you were younger, were you abused by a paedophilic train?

Lee: no, no it wasn’t a paedophile, I was with my parents.

Me: did they rent you out?

Lee: No!!!!

Me: hehe, this is getting a bit weird. okay, i see you’re looking at the BR standard class 2 2-6-0. what do you think of this train?

Lee: I don’t like it, it’s a bit, it’s too big, the funnel’s too tall.

Me: so, what is your favourite type of train?

Lee: well, I don’t have a particular favourite. But I do like this one. [SR Q1 class. built during the second world war, and survived bomb blasts. Woo!]

Me: what is it about this train that you find appealing.

Lee: ermm… i think the fact it was built on the cheap, and it survived the whole war, which was a good thing.

Me: Just how cheap was it?

Lee: very.

Me: and in today’s money, that translates to?

Lee: I think it’s about the equivalent of £100,000. that’s it. that cheap!

Me: so, you like cheap things, what are your thoughts on Lidl?

Lee: not as good as ALDI.

Me: Why do you seem to dislike Youtube ‘star’ Toby “TOBUSCUS” Turner?

Lee: he’s American.


Lee: no, sensible.

Me: You approve of his work, before you discover its by him, do you have some reason for this anti-American prejudice? Were you abused by one as a child?

Lee: No i wasn’t abused by Americans. and I just don’t like his style.

Me: You seemed to find his Dead Island and Harry Potter Literal Trailers very entertaining.

Lee: I don’t remember those ones.

Me: Monday 2, period 2, in here. You, Becky and Tyler were watching them.

Lee, oh is that the one with the zombies?

Me: yes.

Lee: well that wasn’t bad. Just generally it’s not my thing.

Me: so you don’t like slightly childish comedy, from foreigners with ADD?

Lee: no, it’s just i don’t like, [sigh]. [Giggle]. [Raucous laughter]. erm.. [Giggles] oh dear.

Me: finished with that emotional outburst yet?

Lee: [giggles] i was fine until you asked that. [Giggles] sounded like doctor hibbert then, that laugh, heh heh heh. [Giggles]

Me: I think we’ll leave it there…. Ta-ta.

Lee: toodle-pip.

Well, that was certainly enlightening, and in no way as boring as throttling cheese.

Thanks for reading, Ta-ta.
Love Willski



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